Friday, November 9, 2007

Trumer Sluts, for the record

I love Trumer. It's so refreshing and delicious. Just thinking about it now makes me thirsty. It's like Snickers -- it's really satisfying (I'm just talking about the great branding motto, not actually suggesting that Snickers is anywhere near as satisfying as Trumer) . Luke brought a keg of Trumer up the Sky Fourth of July party a couple of years ago. It was primo. The Fourth was so hot that all you could do was fill up a pint and plop down in the shade. Trumer, for those sadly not in the know, is a pilsner style beer that is brewed in Salzburg, Austria and now in Berkeley, CA, USA, planet Earth. It rocks.

The thing about Trumer, though, is that it apparently breeds low lifes. There has been a proliferation of Trumer sluts lately. Oh, you all know who you are. Don't pretend that you don't. A prime example is Paloma. I had never seen her drink a whole beer before in my life until Matt and I and Amy started bringing Trumer up to Sky. Now, it's hard to catch her without a mostly empty bottle in hand or trying to steal a less empty bottle from the clutches of one of the rest of us or from another Trumer Slut, like Chris or Lore.

Just in case not everyone know who you are, I'm here to out all you Trumer Sluts. Well, at least all of you that are caught on the digital film (is that even called film anymore?) that currently resides on my computer (photo credit to Mica Muskat and Cameron De Palma):
Ok. Matt isn't technically a Trumer Slut since he purchases most of that which is consumed up at Sky, but look at the expressions of longing on those two other Sluts...
Now Chris is definitely a Trumer Slut. It looks like he's been thrown under the truck here, but really, he's just hiding out so no one steals his first sip. Or the next, or the next, or the next, or the last...
Yeah, Maya's one too. She poses like she isn't, but it's all an act. Look at the professional guzzling...that's no joke. (And again, notice the jealous gazes of the unTrumer-ed onlookers).
And here is perhaps the most impressive or the saddest evidence yet. Yes, Katie (Katy? Kate? Our fact checking department attempted to confirm the correct spelling of her name but Val and Mica apparently have an early Friday night cut off...much like the Texas Criminal Court of Appeals) apparently likes a little Trumer action, but does she really need to get the little ones hooked at such a young and tender age? The look of pure Trumer joy on Sarah's face is understandable, but a little precocious and disturbing at the same time.

There are more. Previous posts in the archives have Trumer Slut-a-licious picutres of Val and Paloma both knocking a cold one back. But the rest of the pictures are on matt's computer and its up the stairs so I can't be bothered. Perhaps I'll add an addendum later.

And no, although I SHOULD be paid for this post, I haven't been. Now, please excuse me while I go check the supplies in the fridge...

1 comment:

Val said...

mica has newly discovered trummer as an instrument of coercion. although I'm not actually a trummer slut myself, I have to agree that it's a little hard to resist.

-anyway, I think there's an amendment needed to your post in regards to you, matt and amy being the suppliers. afaik, it's just matt and amy, and you're the biggest trummer slut of em all. (except there was that one bunk batch, you probably brought that)

btw, what's with the antagonistic post? are you trying to bait us into commenting? I think i got suckered in, and I didn't even get any trummer out of it.